Transfer Day 2021 - Day 19

Today is Transfer Day! 

Such an emotional day for so many reasons but I'm happy to report that we were able to transfer our one remaining embryo first thing this morning.  Similar to the morning of transfer day in 2018, I got up and did a 30 minute workout.  Rather than hitting the gym, I went downstairs and hopped on the Max Trainer. It was nice to be able to get some sort of activity as I was anxious and I hadn't actually been able to sleep very well.  I showered, D administered my progesterone injection and then we got Declan up for school and went along with our typical morning routine.

My appointment was scheduled for 8 am so we dropped Declan off, came home and gathered my meds and paperwork and headed off to the FP office.  Because of the pandemic and medical facilities being extra precautious, D couldn't go into the office with me but I did want to have him there for moral support so he sat in the hallway throughout the process.  I sat in the waiting room for about 10 minutes until they called me back to get changed and prepared for the transfer.  I was the 2nd transfer of the morning so my Fertility Coordinator went over the paperwork and told me to sit tight and continue to drink my water until the 1st transfer was complete.  I was nervous about my water consumption. The last transfer my bladder wasn't full enough by the time it was my turn and then it was too full, but I drank as much as I could and I was feeling really uncomfortable.  I said it the last time and I'll say it again, that is the possibly the worst part of this whole process.  I got used to the injections, transvaginal ultrasounds, and back in 2018 the egg retrieval but the feeling that your bladder is going to explode from so much liquid is insane.  Thankfully, when I got situated onto the table and my Coordinator checked my bladder, it was exactly where it needed to be. Whew, that's exactly the news I wanted to hear!

While she went to get the doctor for the transfer, the embryologist Michelle reviewed my name, birthday and confirmed we had one embryo to transfer.  She informed me that they did assisted hatching with the embryo before the transfer which could help with implantation. She then went to prepare the catheter while the doctor came in to complete his pre-transfer checklist and set the outer catheter for the implantation. And when that was all complete, we were ready for implantation!  I watched on the screen as the doc, set everything in place and implanted my lone embryo.  I sat on the table for another minute or two and the doctor again warmed up his hands, placed them on my abdomen and told me to be positive.  This whole process is such an exciting and emotional experience! I was in the Transfer room for about 0-15 minutes and then I was free to empty my bladder and get dressed. Once dressed my Coordinator told me that the next step is to wait these two weeks and see what happens.  I have two scheduled blood draws on February 9th and February 11th and from those we'll know if our family will be expanding.

I met D out in the hallway and we headed down to the car to spend the rest of the day together, trying to be positive but also realistic.  I had one request for our ride home.  We needed to stop at Chic-Fil-A for chicken biscuits.  It was our after transfer snack in 2018 and I wanted to keep with tradition.  We hardly ever go out and get breakfast and we hadn't had a chicken biscuit from Chic-Fil-A since our transfer in 2018.

Once home, D wanted to go to the gym and since the doctor told me to stay active today, I decided to go and walk on a treadmill for another 30 minutes.  Nothing strenuous but just something to keep myself moving.  This afternoon, we're going to try to tackle a few things around our house.  It's very rare we have a day off at home without having our schedules booked.  I wasn't able to take any time off of work around Christmas and the two days we had at Thanksgiving were filled with holiday preparations so today will be our day to just do some random stuff we've been meaning to do for months.  Ultimately we need to keep our minds going and just hope and pray for the best.

Here are a few pics from the morning:

My Transfer Day Selfie (pandemic style - that's my mask on my neck) --

Our sweet little embryo preparing for transfer --

Our transferred embryo (the dates on the ultrasound are from my patient file, the actual transfer date is 01/26/2021) -- 

Finally, I'm jotting this down here and quite possibly I've mentioned this before but I know some people will question why we decided to do this during the pandemic and I know I don't have to justify our decisions, but I'm going to explain why we decided to do this now rather than wait.  The biggest reason for moving forward now is due to my age.  I'm not getting any younger and if I want for this transfer to at least have some sort of shot with working, I knew it was now or never.  Never was not an option as we knew we would try to use whatever viable leftover embryos we had from 2018 when we completed our transfer in 2018.  After implanting 2 to have Declan, we had one remaining embryo of a decent grade.

Pregnancy is not easy on anyone but being of "advanced maternal age" or having what is considered a "geriatric pregnancy" is a risk in itself.  If I could go back and change the timeline of my life, maybe I wouldn't be pushing 38 and attempting to have a second child, but I tried to be responsible and it took me some time to find someone I wanted to spend the rest of my life with and actually have a family with.  If people ask why didn't I wait to get the vaccine until we started this process and here is my answer for that -- I'm at the bottom of the list for the COVID vaccine, as I should be as I'm fairly healthy and even though I work in an essential industry, I can keep to myself in my office which not many people can say they can do.  Waiting for the vaccine, could have added another 6-9 months to this process for me and with age/time not on my side, we jumped at the chance to get on our Fertility office's calendar.  While I can't say I'm protected against COVID, I've tried to take as many precautions as I could to ensure we could go through this process.  Do I hate that my husband couldn't be at any of my fertility appointments and couldn't watch the transfer today?  Yes, but my hope is that if we do end up pregnant, we can have a somewhat normal labor and delivery in 40 or so weeks.

So there is my explanation and some people will choose to disagree with me but again I'd remind these people that they are not living in our shoes and they probably don't realize we gave this so much thought before even calling the FP office to set up the visit to talk about our options.

Anywho, I'll update again soon!

Declan's Favorite Phrases

 I wanted to jot this down before I forgot because it's just the cutest, so I figured why not create a whole post about Declan's Favorite Phrases right now.

At 27 months, this boy keeps us on our toes.  Somedays he's an absolute love bug and other days, he lives up to the name "terrible two." But one thing is for sure, he's the best little boy and I'm so lucky to be his mama. I haven't been around a whole lot of kids and besides my own son, the last two year old I was really around was Nicole and she's 24 now so it's been a few years and I've lost a few brain cells over the past 22 years, so I don't really remember all of the things a typical two year old knows and does. 

I know I'm partial to my son but he seems to be a smarty pants to me.  He has full on conversations with us and picks up on everything going on around him.  Sometimes I think he's going on 4 or 5 and not two and a half and I have his school and my family to thank for everything they do for him and helping us raise him.

Here is a list of his current phrases that he uses when talking to us and probably the funniest thing is that he uses them appropriately and at the right time in conversation:

- Let's do it!

- I love it! (mimicking the GMC holiday commercial and using it with everything he loves)

- That's right.

- Mommy, can I help you?

- No more treats ma'am! (Talking to Kinny who sits and patiently waits for treats at the pantry all day.)

- No way Jose!

- See you later alligator!

- You're my best friend. (randomly he will say this to me, Michael, my mom, etc.)

- Let's talk freighters (sounds a bit like taters but he loves talking boats and about the Soo Locks with Daddy)

- Can I put a tab in? (one of Declan's chores is putting a dishwasher tab in so we can start the dishwasher, he absolutely loves being a helper)

- I need a quarter for my piggy bank. (after said chores, Declan gets a quarter for his bank and he won't let you forget it.)

I'm sure there are more that I'm forgetting but these are the ones that either crack me up or melt my heart every time I hear them. He's a charmer and a bit of a class clown and definitely keeps us on our toes!

FET Update - Day 16

 We're 16 days into the FET process right now and this journey is as emotional as I remember it was 3 years ago.  I had my 2nd monitoring appointment on Tuesday morning and the doctor again checked my lining measurement and various hormone levels with a blood draw.  My lining again was where it needed to be given the amount of meds I've been on so they kept my steroid and estrogen dosages the same but added the progesterone injections starting on Wednesday.  Not having to do shots as much as before, I was a bit nervous to start them on Wednesday morning but D and I watched a YouTube video to refresh ourselves on the basics of giving the shots.  I remember when researching everything the last time that many women hated the shots saying they hurt or caused lumps or were hard to inject since the progesterone is in oil but so far, it's gone fairly well.  Even when we did the injections 3 years ago, I just kinda went with them -- they weren't horrible and I knew any discomfort would be worth it.  This time I feel the same way.  And, after giving birth to Declan nearly completely naturally (since my epidural didn't have time to work), these progesterone shots seem like they are a breeze.  At one time I used to be so afraid of needles I wouldn't even get a flu shot but now after IVF, pregnancy, childbirth, and FET, I just turn my head and let the doctor/nurse/phlebotomist/D do their thing.

When I left my appointment on Tuesday, my fertility coordinator told me that she'd text me by the end of the week and give me details on when to come into the office on Tuesday, the 26th for my transfer. I was bit anxious when I drove away because I like having my plan in place but I had faith in the process and went on to start my day at work.  Yesterday mid-day my coordinator sent me a text and told me to be at the office at 8 am on Tuesday morning in my loose clothing with my bottle of water and have a mostly full bladder.  So....transfer day is set!  I'm still not sure if D will be able to be in the room for the transfer and I failed to ask at my appointment but I'm hopeful that he can be there with me.  Never in my wildest dreams did I think I'd be going through an FET during a pandemic but with my 38th birthday in just 6 days, it's pretty much now or never for us.

I know I don't know what the future will bring but I'm staying positive and I know that whatever happens happened for a reason and I'm lucky to have the life I do with a family that I love.

Oh and before I end this post, I found this meme online and I had to laugh because it is so true!

A Holiday Update and So Much More

 Oh what a month we've had....we made it through the Christmas and New Years and have been trying to figure out what's in store for 2021.

Let's recap our Christmas first -- we again stayed home for Christmas and celebrated at our house. Christmas Eve we "Zoomed" with Dustin's family and made pizzas.  We opened the gifts we shipped to each other on our Zoom and made the best of our holiday apart.  We set out our cookies and milk for Santa and waited patiently for Christmas morning.  Christmas morning, my mom and Michael got to our house early so that they could see what Santa brought Declan.  We ate casseroles I prepared for breakfast and then opened our family gifts.  Overall it was a day where we just relaxed and played with our new toys.  Santa brought Declan a tent, garbage truck and a Mr. Potato Head.

We celebrated Christmas with my dad's side on the 26th and while we were hesitant to all get together for Thanksgiving, we decided to have a semi-outdoor socially distanced Christmas together in Aunt Kathy and Uncle Steve's heated garage.  We hadn't seen everyone since Declan's birthday back in October so it was good to get together. Declan has so much fun playing with Abigail and Henry and showed off just how smart he's gotten lately.

Christmas with my dad's side also allowed me to catch up with my sister-in-law. While Kahla and I don't get much of a chance to talk regularly, I cherish the times we do get the time to talk.  I trust her and know I'm lucky to have her as a confidant. We sat away from the rest of the fam and talked about the last few months, including how she was feeling after a COVID-19 diagnosis, how married life is going for both of us, and our fertility journeys. I also filled Kahla in on something I'd been holding onto for weeks....we went back to our fertility clinic to see about the options for using our remaining frozen embryo. 

Back on October 20th, we set up an appointment with the FP office to talk to the doctor.  The doctor and embryologist reviewed my chart and thought that if I wanted to use the embryo, I probably could.  They could not be sure that it would result in another child but if we wanted to implant it, we were free to do so.  The embryo has a quality of BB and with me being 34 when it was frozen, it may be of better quality that if the decided to retrieve additional eggs at 37. We made the decision to get on the list for the next open FET cycle, which happened to be January.

So we started the protocol in December with more birth control to get my cycle regulated and on January 8th, I started the fertility meds for the FET.  The thing that is different with the FET (frozen embryo transfer) compared to the egg retrieval and fresh transfer I went through back in January 2018 is that I don't have to do the stim shots as I did before. This time, I'm on a steroid (Prednisone) and two Estrogen hormones (pills and gels).  I had my first monitoring appointment this past Tuesday (01/12) and met with my fertility coordinator and the doctor. My ultrasound showed that my lining was where it needed to be and in the words of my doctor, my uterus is excellent.

I go back for a second monitoring this Tuesday (01/19) and start my progesterone oil shots and we're scheduled for the FET on Tuesday, January 26th.

Again, besides talking to Kahla about deciding to pursue the FET, we haven't said anything to anyone.  We're going to wait awhile to see how everything turns out and then tell our families about our journey. Personally, I am fine with whatever happens.  Just like when I went through this journey with Declan, I know everything is in God's plan.  I'm so grateful and lucky for my miracle son.

I'm hoping to be able to update more on the FET process over the next few weeks but it all depends on how much time and energy I actually have to do so. Life with a 2 year old and my full time job can be absolutely insane somedays and by the time I sit down, I'm usually asleep 5 minutes after that.

Here Comes Santa Claus

 We're in full holiday mode here and we're looking forward to Santa's arrival next Friday.  For the first time in our married life, we're staying home and not making the trip north. With that being said, we still don't really know what we're doing here at home. 

For Thanksgiving, we stayed in our bubble and had dinner with my mom and Michael and Declan had so much fun playing with Noel, Patchy and Boo along with all of his toys in his room.  It was a nice, simple day.

Since Thanksgiving, we've decorated our house and put up our Christmas tree, we've shopped online for Christmas gifts, we drove through a Christmas lights display and made Christmas cookies.  With one week left, we still need to wrap our Christmas gifts and make our gingerbread house.  Then we will be ready for Santa's visit!

Declan has really gotten into the holiday.  He talks about Santa, Mr. Grinch and Santa's reindeer constantly. It's so sweet and he melts my heart.  Tomorrow he has his Christmas party at school and similar to his Halloween party, I know he's excited for the snacks and cute games his teacher will come up with for the kids to play.  Speaking of school, he's doing so well in his new class.  He loves hanging out with his friends and his vocabulary is out of this world. I'm amazed at how much he picks up and how he responds to what we're saying and doing.  Right now one of my favorites is "Avocados from Mexico."  

He still loves helping in the kitchen and cooking with us and has gotten into watching The Pioneer Woman lately.  Funny story from last weekend, we were watching Home Alone and it got to the part where the bad guys were in the house and were getting hurt by Kevin's hijinks and Declan got so upset that they were getting hurt that he started crying and asked that we watch The Pioneer Woman instead. I tried to explain it was a Christmas classic and they were bad guys, but he wasn't having it so we turned it off and watched DVR episodes of The Pioneer Woman.  He's such an empathetic little boy. 

Otherwise, we haven't been up to a whole lot.

Here are a few pics of our latest happenings (or really just cuteness overload on behalf of Declan).

Declan is 2!!!

 Never in my wildest dreams think I would have a two year old but here we are one week after his birthday party and my little boy is TWO!!

Declan's actual birthday was on Monday but we celebrated last Saturday with a small party with our families.  Declan requested a tractor themed party with tacos, cupcakes and ice cream and this mama tried to fulfill those wishes.  After taking a few minutes to warm up to everyone, Declan had a blast playing with his cousins and being the center of the day.  Mommy and Daddy surprised him with a bike, Nana and PaPa surprised him with a Jeep and he also got a tractor trike from Steve, Kathy, Nicole and Matt along with a lot of other fun books, clothes, money and toys from everyone else.

He enjoyed his tacos and got he biggest kick out of us singing Happy Birthday to him. This year, unlike last year with his smash cake, he actually dug into it and enjoyed every bite.  We also taught him how to blow out his birthday candle which he thought was the coolest.

One other highlight for Declan's day was that Uncle Paul and Aunt Judy drove down from Chicago to attend the party. Declan talked about "Uncle Paul and Judy" for about a week before his party and was so happy to see them. We showed him a video from Christmas where Uncle Paul pushed him on an ottoman and he got the biggest kick out of it.  In fact, we had to keep watching it over and over again. I think he really wanted to recreate it too but unfortunately we don't own an ottoman.  Overall it was a really fun day and I'm so glad that in spite of all of the craziness in the world, we were able to come together to celebrate our miracle!

On Declan's actual birthday on Monday, we had a fairly normal day. Declan went to school and we went to work. D had a work dinner so once I picked up Declan from school we headed to Nana and PaPa's for dinner and more cake. We had chicken parmesan, spaghetti and cauliflower casserole to celebrate the night.  Luckily D's dinner got over early so he was able to join us for cake and Nana made Declan a special green cake to match his tractors.

Tuesday afternoon I took Declan to his two year checkup at the pediatrician. Going to the doctor is definitely different due to the pandemic. We had to sit in the car until they called us in for the appointment. We had to answer all of our questions via a telephone call with the nurse and then we wore our masks and headed directly back to a room for the checkup. This was only the second time Declan has worn a mask and I was nervous he wouldn't keep it on even though it was required. He got through it like a champ though and even got his flu shot for the year.  When we got home, we spent some extra time outside enjoying the weather and playing in the rocks in the front yard.

This week at school they also started transitioning Declan to the two year old room. He got to spend a few hours each day making new friends and getting to know his new teacher. I know he'll miss some of his friends in the toddler room (he talks about Margot and Leah all the time!) but he's ready to move on  and I'm excited to see him continue to grow and learn.

Speaking of learning and growing, Declan has become a sponge at learning new tricks and is talking up a storm. He has started putting words together to make sentences and let's you know exactly what he wants. He's at such a fun age and each day is a new adventure.  It's so exciting to see what new things he will do and what he will say.  I'm so lucky to be this little guy's mama!

Labor Day 2020

 We're enjoying the last little bit of summer and taking full advantage of our 3 day weekend.  In spite of all of the craziness, we've found time to get out and bring some normalcy to our time together.

Last weekend, our niece and nephew turned 9 and we got to celebrate their birthdays with a socially distanced pool party at my dad's. Declan absolutely loves the water and since swimming lessons were again cancelled, it was great to get him into the pool before the weather changes.  He had a blast playing with his cousins and socializing with other family that attended.  He may of also enjoyed a cupcake or two during our visit.

This weekend, we decided to keep with our tradition of apple picking. We found a cute, little orchard in Augusta, MO last year and decided to visit again this year. Declan had so much fun peach picking on vacation in July and figured he would have as much fun with the apples. We did not disappoint our little guy. He loved picking apples straight off of the tree and taking a big bite out of them. We ended up picking almost 14 pounds of apples and I'm sure he ate about a pound in the orchard.  He learned about an "apple picker" and even got to see a tractor at the farm and orchard.

After apple picking, we went to one of our favorite spots for pizza and took in more time outside when we set up Declan's pool in the backyard.  We have no idea when we're going to be able to get him back into swimming lessons but we're happy we can at least set up his little pool when it's nice out in the meantime.  He seems to love any type of water (bath, little pool, big pool) so his afternoon was made.

Today we're taking it easy at home before restarting the work week tomorrow.  We're having a picnic of smoked pulled pork (thanks D!) at home and spending as much time outside as we can.  We're also starting the party preparations for Declan's 2nd birthday next month.  It's so hard to believe that our miracle is almost two.  He's so excited for his tractor party and this mama isn't going to let him down.

Hope everyone has a relaxing and safe Labor Day!

Summer Fun

We're continuing to enjoy our summer and we've been having fun checking out new spots while staying social distanced.

After our stay-cation, D had to travel out of town for work for a week so Declan and I got some extra special time together.  We stayed close to home but got outside to walk on one of our favorite trails and spent a good amount of time hanging out at Nana and Papa's house.

Last weekend Dustin and I celebrated our 5 year wedding anniversary. 5 years -- sometimes its hard to believe it been that long and other times it seems like its been longer.  Originally we were thinking about a weekend away and then the pandemic hit and we decided to scrap that idea. We still wanted to celebrate but we decided to just go out for the day.  We took Declan with us and headed to Charleville Winery and Microbrewery in Ste. Genevieve on Saturday afternoon.  It was the perfect setting for the day -- we sat outside under the porch and enjoyed some snacks and drinks while taking in the rolling hills. Declan loved the owners' dog that moseyed through the yard, seeing a tractor (one of his new favorite things!) on the property and eating.  After a few hours, we headed back home and had a low-key night in, having Taco Bell for dinner and finishing the last of our wedding cake.  Our top layer of cake lasted us 5 years and really it was as good at the 5 year mark as it was year one. (The perk of picking a great wedding cake bakery -- thanks Wedding Wonderland!)

The weekdays are typically filled with a lot of work and not much time for fun once we get home in the evening so we've made it a point to plan a fun weekend day each week.  This weekend we took Declan to Big Joel's Safari Park and Petting Zoo.  He loved going to the Zoo during our stay-cation and still talks about the animals he saw so I thought it would be fun for him to get up close to animals and get a chance to pet them and possibly feed them.  He wasn't afraid and got used to holding the spoon out for the animals to eat from but he wasn't so sure about them eating directly from his hand though!

Probably the highlight of the day for Declan was getting to play on a tractor, truck and train made out of wood.  He had to make two trips to the kids' area and wasn't happy when we had to leave. This kid is obsessed with trucks, tractors and trains -- not sure where he got his love of machinery (guess it runs in the genes) but its so cute watching him and hearing him talk about all 3.

After the safari park, we headed to lunch and sat outside watching the "big trucks" pass by on the interstate and my little dude left as a happy camper.

We plan to spend as many weekends as we can soaking up the sun and enjoying as much time outside as possible before we're stuck back inside.

Staycation 2020

Today is the last day of our summer stay-cation and we've had a fun week in spite of the pandemic still raging on throughout the community. I definitely feel we made the right choice for this summer and we made great memories as a family over the past week. So here's a rundown of our family stay-cation.

Last Saturday was our first official day of vacation but Declan had swimming lessons so we stuck around home for the most part and had a normal Saturday after swimming lessons in the morning.

On Sunday, we drove to St. James, MO and visited Maramec Spring Park.  We've been getting into the outdoors a lot more due to the pandemic and Maramec Spring Park did not disappoint. We circled the spring and talked to the trout and learned more about the history of the area.  The water was so clear and we got a lot of steps in circling the fishing holes. Afterwards we stopped for lunch at Public House Brewing and sat out in The Gardens enjoying a burger and a refreshing drink.

On Monday, we had 9 am reservations at the St. Louis Zoo.  We got up early and picked up my mom and Michael and headed east. I personally hadn't been to the zoo in 20-25 years and was excited to take Declan to see the animals.  We donned our masks and saw as many of the exhibits as we could given the current conditions. The best part of the day for Declan was getting to ride the train around the park a few times.  He also got a chimpanzee stuffed animal named Eco that Nana bought for him at the gift shop and that's his new buddy when he stays at Nana and Papa's house.

On Tuesday, Dustin wanted to take care of some of the chores around home so we laid low most of the morning and played hockey in the basement and then helped D cut grass with the intention of going to Babler State Park in the afternoon but the weather had different plans for us as it stormed all afternoon as soon as Declan woke up from his nap. So instead, we went to GFS and picked up supplies for Ribfest weekend.

On Wednesday, we headed to Grafton to explore Pere Marquette State Park and pick fruit at Eckerts. We stopped at Eckerts first and picked peaches and blackberries out in the orchards. After picking our fruit, we took a drive through Pere Marquette and had a picnic lunch. Declan enjoyed picking the fruit straight from the trees and sampling his choice at Eckerts.

Wednesday evening my mom and step-dad offered to take Declan for the night so that Dustin and I could have a dinner date. It was the first time we've actually gone out to dinner just the two of us in a long time. We drove out to Wentzville and had dinner at Stone Summit Steak and Seafood. It's been a place we've wanted to try for some time and since they had an outdoor patio, it was a great choice for the night. Declan had so much fun spending the night at Nana and Papa's and didn't seem to care that we weren't there.

On Thursday, we picked up Declan and headed to the National Museum of Transportation. Declan has a new obsession with trains and tractors and we thought it would be fun for him to see some big equipment up close.  He again loved riding the miniature train around the complex and even climbed up into an engine and pretended to drive the train.  Another cute thing he picked up after riding the trains at both the Zoo and the NMOT is that he knows what a train conductor says when their ready to roll.  You can ask him, "Declan, what does a train conductor say?" and he proudly belts out "All Aboard...ChooChoo."  It's the best.

On Friday, we decided to stay home again as Dustin was preparing to head to Ribfest on Saturday morning and wanted to get his ribs on the smoker so that he was ready for the competition. It was a pretty quiet day at home and after Declan's afternoon nap, we let him play out in the "pool" in the backyard.  Nana and Papa came over that evening and Declan helped make homemade pizza for dinner.

On Saturday, Dustin headed out super early for Chicago with my step-dad Michael.  Declan and I thought it would be best to stay home this year and allow him to have fun here. We had swimming lessons to attend and this time Mommy got to go in the pool with Decky (Decky is the nickname Declan gave himself and it's the cutest.)  My mom came with us and took pictures and cheered Declan on. He had an absolute blast swimming, splashing and jumping in.

After swimming, we came back home and my mom helped me meal prep for the week ahead. With going back to work, I needed to make sure we're prepared as much as possible for the week ahead. Then we headed back to my mom's to have dinner and see Boo the cat and "NoNo" (Noel the dog). Declan absolutely loves the pets and running around there (or sitting in their beds).  We had dinner with my mom and then came home for bedtime.

Today has been another low-key day. Declan and I have been playing and "cooking" (playing with a saucepan and pretending) and waiting for Daddy and Papa to get back from Ribfest.

Overall we had a good week home and enjoyed some much needed downtime.  Declan is eager to get back to school and see his friends this week but I'm sure glad we got to make some memories together over the past week. I know he won't remember much of it as he gets older but I realize that I definitely will remember this time with him and will treasure it forever.

Mid-Summer Update

We're about halfway through summer and I'm 8 weeks back to work in the office, so I thought it would be a good time to check in and update. 

We're still enjoying a lot of time at home but have found a new fun family activity on the weekends to get out of the house -- hiking.  Each weekend we find a trail in our area to go out and enjoy the weather (albeit hot) and get some exercise in. Thankfully we live in a great area with trails galore, which has made it fun to get out while social distancing.  We may or may not reward ourselves with ice cream depending on the day and temperature but it gives us something to look forward to on the weekends.

Declan is so happy to be back at school too.  Our little guy missed the interaction with his friends and teachers and besides day one, when he was a tiny bit sad at drop off, he's thrived with being back in his routine. Unlike myself, my son is a social butterfly who likes to go play with his friends and teachers each day.  It makes me feel better knowing that he's excited to go to school each day and I know the school is taking all of the extra precautions to keep him healthy.  He's such a smart boy too and at 21 months, he knows all of his colors, a multitude of animals, sounds, names (he remembers every name!), different foods and all sorts of objects (tools are his favorite).

Working on puzzles at school

We also re-enrolled Declan in swimming lessons this summer and he absolutely loves going to the pool on Saturday mornings. Like preschool, the facility is taking extra precautions and the class size is limited to just 4 babies/toddlers but he's having a blast in the water.  Unfortunately our neighborhood pool is closed for the summer, but the lessons on each week have been a blessing for us and so much so that we've signed up for the next 8 week session so Declan can go to the "pool" through September.

Swimming with Daddy

Next week, D and I are taking off a week from work for our vacation.  We debated for months if we were going to take a trip somewhere or just stay home and we finally decided given the uptick in Covid cases all over, we'd just take a stay-cation this year. We're still planning to enjoy our time off but rather than driving 13 hours to the cabin or to a beach, we're going to spend the week exploring our own area. We reserved a spot at the zoo for one day, we're going to go hiking a few days and hit other outside attractions during our time off -- all focusing on being outside and keeping our distance from others.  Both D and I are in need of time off as work has been crazy for both of us and I'm ready to unplug for a week.

Other than everything mentioned above, the only other activity taking up our time is spending time helping at my mom and Michael's house.  They moved in a few weeks ago and are finishing up the last of the construction/clean up/moving in process and we've helped out as we can.  It's also allowed Declan to spend time with Nana and Papa and typically, we get to have dinner together a few nights a week.

Having 2nd breakfast at Nana and Papa's

It's been a pretty good summer so far, nothing like what I expected of summertime (in pre-pandemic life) but we're making memories and enjoying our time together.

End of Quarantine

Today was officially my last day of working from home.  After 9 weeks of working in the middle of my living room, I will be reporting back to the office starting on Tuesday next week. This is only possible as Declan is going back to preschool starting on Tuesday and I have to say it is all very bittersweet.
At times it's been extremely hard to work from home.  Some days I couldn't concentrate and just wanted to do something fun with my son.  Other days, I put my headphones in and went to town with little to no distraction as was able to get twice as much work done as I would have in the office and other days, was a combination of work craziness and home craziness.  I wouldn't change anything about the last 9 weeks...well, maybe besides my level of patience and cutting myself a break when I felt like I was failing at everything.
But, the silver lining is that I got to spend more time with my son and watch him grow up so much! Each day he's learning and absorbing more and more and I'm just so happy I got to be a part of it every day.  I loved having him come up to me while I've been working and hugging me and saying "mama work" or making animal noises at me.  I loved hearing about the tractors and lawnmowers he saw while out on his daily walk and checking in on him while he napped.  I've loved getting the extra time with him on my furlough days and while we haven't had any extravagant plans, we've been able take walks or play in the rocks or stop by Nana and Papa's to check on the construction progress at their new house.

One thing I'm really proud to have done during this quarantine is a project at my mom and Michael's new house.  My mom wanted ship lap in her bathroom and I thought it would be fun to help make it happen.  I bought the ship lap supplies from Home Depot (Michael picked it up curbside) and helped Michael install it one afternoon when I was off of work.  I learned how to use a nail gun and how to install ship lap properly.

I'm a bit nervous to go back to work in the office. It reminds me of how I felt when my Maternity Leave was over and I had to drop Declan off at school for the first time. This time will be a bit different though as there still are health and safety precautions the school will be taking to ensure the kids stay safe so I'll be unable to come in and spend extra time with him when I drop him off.  I'm sure it will be harder on me than on him but I can't help but worry a bit.  I plan on getting as many extra cuddles as he will allow over this long weekend.

Mother's Day Recap

Another week home during self-quarantine and we're getting by.  Today has been another furlough day for me and besides answering a few emails, I'm trying to stay off of my work computer and enjoy the warmer weather with my boy. (He's napping right now so I thought it would be good to update the blog.)

We celebrated Mother's Day this past Sunday and even though we weren't able to go out like we have in years past, we had a good day.  D and my step-dad planned and made me and my mom brunch.  We had a variety of breakfast treats and a few drinks to enjoy the day.  I was also able to take a much needed nap while Declan napped.  Mama naps are few and far between as there always seems to be something that needs to done here at home so it was very nice to get some extra zzzzz's.

I got some really sweet gifts from Declan, D and my mom and Michael.  Declan even handmade me some picture frames out of shaving cream paint for cute pictures of him and Kinny.

We still haven't really ventured out over the last 8 weeks besides going hiking a few weekends ago but we may start to loosen up a bit so that we can focus on the new normal. Obviously we won't be going all over the place, but I don't know how much longer we can stay cooped up at home without going insane.  The weather is finally looking up so we may just take a few more walks and play outside.  Declan's school is thinking about reopening late May or early June and he will be going back.  He's flourished here at home but I know he needs the social interaction with other toddlers to keep growing. 
When Declan's back in school, I'll head back to the office.  I have realized over these weeks, that I need to be in the office in order to manage my team.  Being offsite for this long is difficult and I've overcompensated by working more, which is not good for my mental health.  I haven't gotten the break I need to remain successful at home and at work since my "office" is in the middle of my living room. 
I know we're facing a "new normal" and I think we're about ready to see what it is all about.